Since Dad's departing, having to begin to work through all the things we have to do, then begin to make decisions to help his mother, continues to be hard. In fact, unfortunately one thing i battle w/when I am grieving is getting sick to my stomach. It isn't unusual, because I know others have had the same response.
No matter how hard I try to get a breather from it just for a little while, it seems that is when my husband needs me to listen to him, my oldest comes and needs a hug or whatever, my youngest has questions.
I know from past experience "time" is a key factor for all of us in our healing. Yet the transition from the time of grieving to the time where God has turned our mourning into joy, is something that I can only face sometimes in small doses of time.
I have family members on my side, who don't understand why I hurt to the depth I do. Long before this though, they did not understand nor accept me as I am.
There are many emotions that come and go, sometime, man if they don't hit all at once!
Whew! Many others have traveled this road, including me, all come out in some way different. They take they sorrow, and allow God to turn into a triumph~then others just seem to get a kick out of keeping it all stirred up.
Either way, come Monday I will have my hands full trying to get some services/help setup for mom at home; while initiating finding out information of getting things changed from having Dad's name on them to mom. Each place seems to require different things. Some of them Cleve has to call because he is the executor of the estate and they want to hear from him. Then I do the administrative stuff, as I have always done. Thing is, it is like salt being constantly poured on raw hearts. Ouch!
Well, today I will more than likely try to deviate from mourning just in hopes my stomach will settle down.
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